Taking Time to Thank god....

I'm taking this five minutes to write this post.....to thank god....

1) for bringing me through my hardest times.....
2) for being the one to understand me...
3) for being there to bring peace to comfort me....
4) for knitting me up in my mothers womb....
5) for bringing sunee through the delivery , and brought joseph's family a new member....
6) for giving me every single breathe...and every single heartbeat

most of all....



7) for dying on the CROSS......and gave me SALVATION

These days....These weeks.....Time of the past....Goodbye

IN these days , these weeks , in this time that the world shares altogether , it has been hard for me . Recently , frequently . As heaven rained cats and dogs .

Sometimes at night i would sit on my bedside , while i watch the rain fall off the edge of my roof .

Sometimes , drips of precious tears would make its way down the path of my face , and drip.....drip....drip.

As time slips by , i start to picture the happy laughters she has . It was worth the memory ....sometimes worth some of my precious little time ... to recall that generous , sweet smile she gives , and to remember all that funnie little things she does to make me happy.... memories

Then i would think again of the times i felt jealous ... the pain i had to hold on to , just keep this affection of mine for her . i would think again , was it all worth it ? Did i enjoy it ? it was worth it , and i did enjoy ...

Sometimes , a voice in my head would say , " she already loves another ... you have to give up ..." .... And it was true wad tht voice said , i do want to give up .i do want to stop going on , i want start my own life .

But ....

it was as hard as sepearating naughty fingers that glued itself together with super glu . It was as painful as seperating a nail from its finger ..... i want to ....but its hard ....its been

so long ...

so close...

so dear to my heart ...


Recently , frequently , i finally picked up myself and made a decision ... it was hard i had to do it anyway .

Silently , i said



Goodbye ....


to my affections , to my old self , to sadness

cause no one else in this world can ever hurt me deeper than you ....




myself

REALITY & DREAMS

I often question about REALITY.
Sometimes I really do not know which and where is the reality.

Is this world that I'm living in, I'm blogging now the reality?
Or is the one that in called DREAMS, the real one?

Well, science describes that dreams are the images, thoughts, feelings
we experienced while asleep.
What was explained in Wikipedia:
"The contents and purpose of dreams are not fully understood, though they have bee a topic of speculation and interest throughout recorded history."

Most of us experience dreams every night when we sleep.
Why and how is that possible for people to fail on explaining it in science?

Well, for what I know until now, God and Science cannot be conflicted together.
Science is what is happening on earth, not in everywhere, and of course not all of reality.

Take a look around. Do you think that everything happens because they are coincidences?
NOT.
How could I possibly still alive if everything happens with coincidences?
There must be someone writing the "story", planning for every events that is happening around.
Just try to imagine, everyone is like so unique, everything happens so uniquely, how can this be coincidences?
Try to imagine something else, how is that possible for something like humans just exist and function so well,
with such complete brain that thinks well, with such complex organs that keeps us alive?

How can this world be so complicated when there is not someone behind planning and creating all these?
There is more question you can think of and cannot be answered by science.

And so I believe, God is always there, reality is not just this.
Dreams can be messages from God,
This world that we are living in, the current reality, is just a test, a big test for us.
And it decides our afterlife.
Reality does not end with this life, it continues to another life somewhere else, somewhere sacred, nice, somewhere I have been longing to go..
Reality is always where you are.
Do not question about it.
Live it.
Enjoy it.



Faith told me that.
By Xizhe

L.O.V.E report

According to the dictionary, love means "a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person." In the pass three years and one month , i believe i have had a real look at this thing call "love ".

" Love hurts "


I remembered one person, not going to mention who, but she said something that i think i would remember for life , " Unless you can experience that something yourself , you can never understand that something to the full extend ." According to to this statement , i have experience maybe 50% of wad " love hurts" truly meant. Love hurts when you have an affection for somebody , and then you invest a whole lot in that person . A while after that , when u found out that she is not in favour with you ....... when all is lost ...... that's when "love hurts".


When that person is hurt by love , he will be both physically and mentally hurt . He's life would seem dull . He will feel as if the sun would never rise again . Rain storms seem to be his favourable weather . Blue skies would never cheer him up. And when he tries to sleep , he would feel his eyelids heavy , yet the pain keeps his eyes awake, he will then pray that tomorrow would come quickly. When he wakes up , he finds his pillow wet , not of sweat . He feels tormented when he goes out . Wears a fake smile which would seem the best disguise so that people around him will not pity his fate .

Sadness encircles him ...

Hatred devours him ...

Soon, nothing is left ...

Everything is lost ...

Only hurts gained ...

Scars remain forever ...

Life will never be the same ...


Yet the worst isn't over , he will then find of news about a new guy being with her . That is when tears are left to dry on their own . He will be thinking "Why" , he will be thinking why after so long , she doesn't fall for him, yet in a short period , he falls for another guy? Is he not good enough ? He will then start blaming god , why did god put him in a family background like his ? Why didn't god make him more attractive...

She says she thinks he would be a good friend ... that guy will think " bullshit , only an excuse ..." But what else could she say . " i don''t like you , stay away from me?" . Which of these is easier to be heard? Wouldn't the guy feel even more devastated . '


She says sorry , but for what , it wasn't her fault , and everything is done , can "sorry" bring back what has already happened? thoughts of these will wonder in his brain , then, he finds no hope in this situation .


At this very moment , wad he could hope for is support from understanding friends , cell members , leaders . Hoping that his life will go on . hoping that all that preparation will work ...





Hoping he will never leave God ...





This is the end of my report , hope all readers will be able to benefit from this in one way or another . Thank you for reading .